Your adoption journey continues well after you place your baby with the adoptive family, and so does the care and support from Lifetime Christian Adoption. We understand the complicated feelings and needs that birth mothers have post-placement, and we are here for you.
The physical traces of childbirth will fade, but the emotional journey is one of lifelong growth and change. Even if you are confident that adoption is the right choice for you and your baby, you will feel conflicting emotions: loss, relief, guilt, anger, hope.
These feelings may come in stages, or you might experience several all at once. Your feelings will never “go away,” but they will transform as time passes, as you practice self-care through our support services, and as you see your baby thrive in the arms of a loving Christian family.
What Can I Expect to Feel Right After Placement?
Everyone is different, but knowing what to expect ahead of time can help assure you that it’s completely normal to experience any of the following:
- Trouble eating or sleeping
- Withdrawing from family and friends
- Constantly thinking about your baby
- Longing to hold your baby
- Relief that your baby is with a loving Christian family
In addition to coping with loss, your body will still be reeling from the roller coaster of pregnancy hormones. Many women also experience postpartum depression after giving birth. Whether your feelings come from processing your adoption or your physical recovery, all of your feelings are valid and deserve your attention. Be sure to keep postpartum medical appointments and discuss your feelings and concerns with your doctor.
What Can I Expect to Feel in the Long Term?
Even after time has passed and you feel like you’ve gotten a handle on processing your feelings, certain triggers like an anniversary or a reminder can start the grieving process all over again.
You may also start to feel hope and confidence in your decision as time passes, and your relationship with the Christian adoptive family grows. Whether you choose periodic updates through emails and pictures or a closer relationship with in-person visits, knowing that your baby is safe and cared for by a loving Christian family will help with your healing process.
There is no set timeline for how your feelings should develop. This will be a complicated period to work through, so it’s important to be kind to yourself, practice self-care, and turn your faith.
How Can My Adoption Coordinator Help?
Lifetime Christian Adoption is here for you throughout the adoption process. Our services are available to birth mothers well after the adoption is finalized. That’s also the time when many birth mothers feel they need it the most.
We offer 24/7 assistance. Birth mothers will find free, ongoing support by calling or texting Lifetime Christian Adoption at 1-800-923-6784. Our live, trained staff members are available 24 hours a day and seven days a week, so your call will never go to voicemail.
We can arrange for free professional counseling. At Lifetime Christian Adoption, we understand that mental health is just as important as physical health. If you desire individual counseling at any point during your adoption journey, we can help. Our independent, licensed counselors are available to work with you in person or over the phone. They will make your comfort and convenience a priority.
We have an extensive network of peer support. Lifetime Christian Adoption’s peer support network is made up of women who have been in your shoes. These birth mothers are here to listen, answer questions and help you process feelings that only a fellow birth mother can truly understand. Peer counseling is always free and available in the format that is most convenient to you, whether that means regular appointments or as needed over phone, text, email, or in person.
How Can My Open Adoption Plan Help?
Every Christian adoptive family with Lifetime Christian Adoption is open to communication after placement. We understand how an ongoing relationship can be vital to a birth mother’s healing. Even if you weren’t sure how much contact you wanted to have earlier in your adoption journey, you can always change your mind. Communicate openly and honestly with your adoption coordinator and the Christian adoptive family. You are always in control of these choices.
Every letter, photograph, video chat, or in-person visit will show you that your loving sacrifice has resulted in a hopeful future for your baby. Through open adoption, you and the Christian adoptive parents create a special extended family, so your baby grows up understanding just how loved she truly is. That knowledge will play an important role in your healing as you move forward with your life after placement.