Blaine is a birth father who made the tough decision to put his child’s needs before his own. He’s sharing his story here in the hopes that it will give other men in similar situations insight on how they can face this decision.
When he was 17, Blaine found out that his girlfriend was pregnant. The couple kept her pregnancy a secret as they decided what to do. They were thinking about abortion at first but decided they couldn’t go through with it. Blaine and his girlfriend thought about raising the child themselves but eventually realized that wouldn’t possible.
Four months into his girlfriend’s pregnancy, they started working with an adoption agency and finally told their parents the news. His girlfriend’s parents were shocked and disappointed, which Blaine understood. Blaine knew that he should be held accountable for the choices he made. After adjusting to the situation, his girlfriend’s parents came to be supportive of their adoption plans. Blaine moved out of his parent’s house at 14, but his mother wanted to raise their baby. However, family members of birth parents don’t have legal rights to the baby, so that wasn’t going to happen.
At the Time, Men Like Blaine Were Rare
Today, more men decide to become involved in their child’s adoption plan. But at the time that Blaine and his girlfriend were facing a surprise pregnancy, not many men who stuck around during the adoption process. Blain chose to stand by his girlfriend as the couple went through some of the hardest times in their lives.
Blaine realized that he had no way to care for a baby. When his girlfriend told him she was pregnant, he was living out of his car! They looked at over 200 profiles of hopeful adoptive families, searching for a stable couple who’d been married a long time.
The couple met with three couples hoping to adopt. During the first meeting, Blaine realized that the wife wanted a baby more than the husband. The second couple made Blaine and his girlfriend nervous because they shot each other a lot of looks during the meeting.
Reaching a Decision
Just a few days before their son Josh was born, Blaine and his girlfriend were walking in a park. They noticed a mother who loved her children but was also obviously unhappy. She was yelling and taking her frustration out on her kids as they played.
Blaine recognized that he could easily become that unhappy parent if they decided to parent Josh. That is when he knew he wanted to give his son the best chance at life that he could. Blaine and his girlfriend placed baby Josh with a wonderful adoptive family, and they receive updates on him monthly.