You’ve worked peacefully through your adoption process, and now you’re wondering what a prospective birth mother would be interested in knowing about you and your family. You’re not alone. Many adoptive parents struggle with this. So, what do birth mothers look for in adoption profiles?
Some birth mothers know exactly what they want in a family, but others aren’t exactly sure. You want to be as open and honest as possible, so when a birth mother looks at your profile, she’ll get a good impression of you and your family.
Items to Include in Your Profile
Your adoptive family profile should give a birth mother a glimpse into your family’s life. Of course, not all adoptive family profiles will look the same. You can be as creative as you want, but it’s probably a good idea to include some key information in your profile.
Reason for Adopting
Birth parents reading your profile will be curious about why you’re pursuing adoption. Explain what led you to this decision. Talk about your journey and how God led you so far. As you talk about the adoption process, the birth mother will feel your excitement.
Be sure to share how your family shows respect for adoption and will celebrate your child’s adoption their entire life.
Most birth mothers are curious about what a typical day would look like with your family. As you describe your day, be sure to talk about what your adopted child will do. Talk about routines, meals, chores, school, playtime, evening family times, library trips, friends, and the list can go on.
Give a snapshot of what life is like around your house. You can include photos of your family enjoying life together: taking walks, playing, or reading together. Share anything that you think will give the birth mother a good idea about a day in the life of your family.
Talk about what your faith means to you and your family. How does your faith impact your life? What are the positive aspects of your religious community?
If you’re a couple, it’s important to give the birth mother a sense of your relationship. Tell her how long you’ve been together, where you met, and why you two decided to adopt.
Explain how God has put adoption on your hearts and that you’re excited to add a new member to your family. Don’t forget to talk about what you and your partner value, such as your faith and church membership.
Hobbies & Family Vacations
Share about your family’s favorite vacations or special hobbies you like to do together as a family. Include pictures of these activities and events.
If your family enjoys sports, talk about going to games together or how you play on a team. A potential birth mother will be trying to imagine what life would look like for her child in your family. You can also talk about future plans like a road trip to visit grandparents or a camping trip in the mountains.
Birth mothers want to see where their child will live. You can show pictures or tell stories about when you moved to your house. Talk about the neighborhood and neighbors. Be sure to mention your other kids and what they love about the house.
Show pictures of the bedrooms, the kitchen, living room, and the backyard. These photos help the birth mother visualize where her child will live, play and eat their meals.
Add photos of your extended family and friends. A birth mother will be interested to know of all the family members her child will grow up knowing. If they are excited and supportive of you adopting a child, share that!
If you haven’t done so yet, be sure to mention your other children. Add lots of photos of them and share information on each child. Many birth mothers like the fact that their child will have older siblings.
Birth mothers will want to hear your plans about parenting. You can share your parenting values and how you plan to raise your child to be a happy, healthy adult in your profile. As a Christian, you’ll want to emphasize your faith and your Bible view of parenting kids.
Finally, make sure to indicate how much contact you’re open to with your child’s birth mother in the future. Many birth mothers are hoping for an open adoption, whether that be through emails, phone calls, letters, or visits, or a combination of these.
What do birth mothers look for in adoption profiles?
They’re looking for a loving, kind-hearted family to raise their child. Be yourself and show them your wonderful home where their child will grow up. Ask God to help you present yourself and your family in the best way possible. In time, He’ll bring a sweet child to be a new member of your family.
As the Vice President (VP) of Lifetime Adoption, Heather Featherston holds an MBA and is passionate about working with those facing adoption, pregnancy, and parenting issues. Heather has conducted training for birth parent advocates, spoken to professional groups, and has appeared on television and radio to discuss the multiple aspects of adoption. She has provided one-on-one support to women and hopeful adoptive parents working through adoption decisions.
Since 2002, she has been helping pregnant women and others in crisis to learn more about adoption. Heather also trains and speaks nationwide to pregnancy clinics to effectively meet the needs of women who want to explore adoption for their child. Today, she continues to address the concerns women have about adoption and supports the needs of women who choose adoption for their child.
As a published author of the book Called to Adoption, Featherston loves to see God’s hand at work every day as she helps children and families come together through adoption.