In today’s culture, multiple options exist for unwanted pregnancies. Most of them put the woman’s convenience foremost in any decision. But what about the baby? What about adoption?
An Unmarried Pregnancy Story
Let’s look at Kelsie’s story. She’s a 17-year-old high school student in Northern California. Her family attends Mass weekly, and she met her boyfriend at her parish. They have been committed to keeping their faith and being responsible in their relationship. However, around the middle of her junior year, she accidentally got pregnant when she and her boyfriend got carried away after a Christmas party. She feels guilty and ashamed, and her boyfriend isn’t sure how to handle all this. They both know that sex outside of marriage is wrong – how could they make such a mistake? They were too young to get married, and neither one believed in abortion.
Reluctantly, they approached the counselor at their parish to confess and to seek advice. To their relief, the counselor welcomed their questions and assured them that they could be forgiven. He then explained that God values the sanctity of life, so one option to consider was adoption.
He recommended Lifetime Christian Adoption, which was founded on Christian principles and could guide them throughout the entire adoption process. He assured them this was a safe, empathetic, and non-judgmental source of help.
Why Adoption?
Adoption opens the door for the best possible outcome among everyone involved. It allows the pregnant woman to respect the value of all human life and to avoid the lifelong guilt and shame of abortion.
Although adoption involves sacrifice, she can do her best for her baby’s health during pregnancy and carry her baby to term. Adoption allows a woman to choose loving adoptive parents for her baby. It also provides a more stable option than foster care. For the adoptive parents, it can be a blessing as it allows them to have a child after facing infertility. Adoption can enable a new family to be made whole.
“I Could Never Give My Baby Away”
Kelsie and her boyfriend hadn’t thought much about adoption. “But isn’t that abandonment? I could never give my baby away,” she said to him. Kelsie already loved her baby so much that she wanted the very best for him or her.
But they called Lifetime anyway and learned much more about the process. After learning more about how modern adoption works, they realized that they could make sure their baby grew up in a loving, stable family.
By choosing adoption, a pregnant woman shows how much she really does love her baby. She’s putting her baby’s needs before her own and making a selfless decision. Caring for her baby throughout the pregnancy and taking the time to go through the adoption process to ensure her baby has loving parents shows responsibility.
Kelsie wondered aloud if she could trust a pair of strangers to raise her baby. The Adoption Coordinator she spoke to explained that if she chose an open adoption, she would get to choose which couple would become her baby’s adoptive parents. From there, she could stay in contact with the adoptive parents and her child. Plus, she could even explain why she chose adoption once her child is old enough to wonder.
After a few weeks of talking to each other and their parents, Kelsie and her boyfriend decided to start the adoption process. They spoke together about what was most important to them in an adoptive family. Lifetime helped them create a birth plan for how things would go at the hospital when it came time for Kelsie to give birth. Her Adoption Coordinator also gave them advice on how to tell family and friends about what was happening.
Creating an Open Adoption Plan
Kelsie and her boyfriend both liked the idea of open adoption because they wanted to have some involvement in their child’s life. They chose the frequency of contact and how they wanted to stay in touch with the adoptive family. The most encouraging part for Kelsie was learning about all the Christian couples across the country who were so eager to adopt a child. She saw pictures and watched videos of real people who could someday be her baby’s parents!
Although it took time, Kelsie and her boyfriend chose a younger couple who lived in a nearby state. This couple couldn’t have children of their own but felt called so strongly to become parents. This couple was grateful for the opportunity to raise Kelsie’s child and viewed this baby as a true blessing. Kelsie marveled at how much joy adoption could bring to another person’s life.
Once she chose adoptive parents, Kelsie felt as though a huge weight had been lifted from her shoulders. Yes, she still had to get through the pregnancy, but now she felt hope instead of despair. She had a plan, and she had caring people from Lifetime to help her through the journey. She knew she and her boyfriend shouldn’t be raising this child, but that her baby had a bright future with this new family instead.
You can learn more about how adoption works by calling or texting Lifetime Christian Adoption at 1-800-923-6784.
As the Vice President (VP) of Lifetime Adoption, Heather Featherston holds an MBA and is passionate about working with those facing adoption, pregnancy, and parenting issues. Heather has conducted training for birth parent advocates, spoken to professional groups, and has appeared on television and radio to discuss the multiple aspects of adoption. She has provided one-on-one support to women and hopeful adoptive parents working through adoption decisions.
Since 2002, she has been helping pregnant women and others in crisis to learn more about adoption. Heather also trains and speaks nationwide to pregnancy clinics to effectively meet the needs of women who want to explore adoption for their child. Today, she continues to address the concerns women have about adoption and supports the needs of women who choose adoption for their child.
As a published author of the book Called to Adoption, Featherston loves to see God’s hand at work every day as she helps children and families come together through adoption.
