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Young pregnant woman looks at her phone while thinking about adoptionWe understand that choosing adoption is a huge decision. That’s why it’s so important for you to consider all the different questions you may want to ask. No question is insignificant when you’re thinking about adoption.
 
As you pray about each of your questions, it will help you in the adoption process. God will give you peace of mind and lead you in the decision. So, check these possible questions that you may be asking yourself right now as you consider adoption.
 

Do I want to keep in contact after the adoption?

Most adoptions today are either semi-open or open adoptions. These types of adoption allow you to develop a relationship with the adoptive parents you’ve chosen before your child is born.
 
After your baby is born, you can stay in touch with the adoptive parents to get regular updates about your child. More specifically, these two different types of adoptions look like this:
 
Open adoption
In an open adoption, you will share regular and continuous phone calls, texts, or emails between the adoptive family and you. These are usually scheduled and may include some or all of these things depending upon the agreement.

Semi-open adoption
This type of adoption is similar to an open adoption, but the relationship will not include the sharing of identifying information, such as your name, where you live, and so on. In semi-open adoption, your adoption agency will usually act as go-between for ongoing contact.
 

Is adoption expensive?

There is no cost for you to choose adoption. You may even be able to get assistance for your pregnancy expenses.
 

Do I need to tell the baby’s father?

Every state has different laws about telling the birth father. Your adoption agency professionals can explain your state’s requirements. They will also do the work for you.
 

Will my baby end up in a good home?

This is a wonderful question, and it shows how much you love and care about your baby already! Every adoptive couple is given a background check and screened. They must fill out forms and have a home study check to be sure they are suitable for adoption.
 
You will be able to choose who you want to adopt your child. Usually, adoptive couples create a booklet or website with information that you can look at. Also, depending on whether you choose open or semi-open adoption, you can meet with the adoptive parents prior to your child’s birth. You have the choice of who adopts your child so you will have peace that he or she is in good hands. Here is a list of questions you may want to ask the prospective adoptive parents:

  • Why do you want to adopt?
  • Do you have friends or family members who have adopted?
  • Why do you think you’ll be good parents?
  • Is your family excited about you adopting?
  • What do your children think about you adopting?
  • What is your neighborhood like?
  • What will you say to my child about their adoption?
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    Will my child think I didn’t love them?

    You will think long and hard about your decision. You may decide to get counseling about your decision. All these actions add up to you wanting to make the best decision for the baby’s life.
     
    Your baby’s adoptive parents will tell him or her how much you love them. You love your baby so much that you’re going through a difficult choice to provide the best possible future that you can for your baby!
     
    The adoptive parents will give your child all the information you desire them to share. You can create a special photo album for your baby to have. It’s also a good idea to write a letter with a prayer for your child that the adoptive family can give him or her when they’re older and can understand. Plus, open adoptions allow you to stay in contact with your child so you can affirm your love.
     

    Can I meet my child when they’re an adult?

    It depends on the type of adoption you choose. Today there are more and more open adoptions, so birth moms and children know one another. If there is a certain amount of openness in the adoption, it will allow you to know your child and the adoptive parents. If it’s a more confidential adoption, it will limit what you can know about your child.
     

    How can I recover from choosing adoption?

    Pregnancy forces you to make choices. Whether you choose to be a full-time parent or make an adoption plan, your choices may be hard. God will lead and guide you.
     
    Adoption is a very personal decision that only you can make. You may want to talk to a counselor to discuss your decision and all the different questions you have. Lifetime Adoption can set you up with a counselor you are comfortable with, at no cost to you.
     
    You’ve already made the wonderful decision to choose life. Adoption does involve sacrifice because you are deciding what is best for your child, more than yourself. And that’s the best reason for choosing adoption.
     

    What are my first steps?

    Contact a caring adoption professional at Lifetime Adoption by texting or calling 1-800-923-6784. They can answer all your questions and set up support for you. They will walk you through each step along the way, praying for you, so you know that you and your child are well taken care of.

    Heather Featherston

    Written by Heather Featherston

    As the Vice President (VP) of Lifetime Adoption, Heather Featherston holds an MBA and is passionate about working with those facing adoption, pregnancy, and parenting issues. Heather has conducted training for birth parent advocates, spoken to professional groups, and has appeared on television and radio to discuss the multiple aspects of adoption. She has provided one-on-one support to women and hopeful adoptive parents working through adoption decisions.

    Since 2002, she has been helping pregnant women and others in crisis to learn more about adoption. Heather also trains and speaks nationwide to pregnancy clinics to effectively meet the needs of women who want to explore adoption for their child. Today, she continues to address the concerns women have about adoption and supports the needs of women who choose adoption for their child.

    As a published author of the book Called to Adoption, Featherston loves to see God’s hand at work every day as she helps children and families come together through adoption.

    Read more about Heather Featherston