A struggling young mother does her homework while at the laundromat with her sonWhether you’re having financial struggles, are unable to parent another child, or wish to give your child more than what you can right now, adoption can be a positive, loving choice. No matter what you’re going through, it’s important to know you’re not alone. There are people ready to help you during this difficult time.
Lifetime Christian Adoption helps women make adoption plans for their newborn or child, up to seven years old. If you need to place a child older than seven years of age, you will need to reach out to social services. They will find a temporary guardian or arrange for a kinship adoption, which means that a relative such as a grandparent, sibling, aunt, or cousin who is over the age of 18 will adopt your child.

What is the process of placing an older child for adoption?

It takes a lot of courage to put the needs of your child before your own needs. Placing your child for adoption gives you control to give your child the kind of life you want them to have, even though it may be a difficult choice for you.
If you’re thinking of placing your child for adoption, you’ll want to meet with an adoption professional. They can answer your questions and offer the necessary information you need to pursue adoption.

Here’s how the adoption process works:

1. First, consider your options at the moment, whether to continue parenting or placing your child for adoption. You will want to talk with a counselor before you make any final decisions. When you contact Lifetime to start an adoption plan, your Adoption Coordinator can connect you with an outside counselor. Talking with a counselor can help you decide what the best decision for you and your child is.
2. If you decide to move forward with adoption, you or your Adoption Coordinator will need to inform your child’s father of your adoption plan. An adoption attorney will inform him of his legal rights as a birth father and provide him with adoption paperwork to sign.
3. You will need to provide information about your child, such as their interests, health, and education. Your Adoption Coordinator can help you do this.
4. Look through adoptive family profiles to choose the best family for your child. Decide which adoptive couple you like best, and meet with them over the phone to see if they’re really a good fit.
5. Once you’ve found the perfect family for your child, you will need to prepare yourself for your child to be placed with them. This is an emotional experience. Talk to your Adoption Coordinator about how to prepare yourself. You may want to meet regularly with a counselor as you walk through this process.
6. Begin transitioning your child to be with their adoptive family. Take your child to meet the adoptive family at a park or playground. Allow your child to get to know them over the following months. The transition should be slow to help your child adjust easier.
If your child is older, you should explain your decision. In addition, it may be a good idea for you and your child to meet regularly with a counselor to help your child walk through the adjustment.

Open Adoption

Many birth moms choose open adoption because it gives total control of what the adoption will look like for both you and your child. Plus, it allows you to stay in communication with your child throughout their life.

  • You choose the adoptive parents-There are many adoptive couples who want to adopt an older child. If you choose an open adoption, your Adoption Coordinator will provide you with adoptive family profiles that describe the family through pictures, letters, and even videos.
  • You create an adoption plan-This plan allows you not only to decide who will adopt your child but how and when they can adopt. You can decide to meet with them to ask questions. You’ll also decide when you want the adoptive parents to meet your child and other details of the adoption.
  • You’ll stay in contact with your child-An open adoption allows you to have contact with your child throughout their life. This could be through phone calls, emails, texts, or visits. You choose how much contact you want with your child.

Studies have shown that open adoption helps a birth mother feel more assured of their child’s well-being. Having contact with your child and the adoptive family builds your trust that your child is safe and in a loving home. You can feel proud of your choice of this family for your child.

Placing My Child Up for Adoption

Choosing adoption when you’re no longer able to parent is a loving decision. If you’re considering adoption for your toddler or older child because you know it’s the best thing for them, remember you are not alone. The caring adoption professionals Lifetime Adoption are here to support and respectfully guide you as you walk through this experience. Just call or text us at 1-800-923-6784.

Heather Featherston

Written by Heather Featherston

As the Vice President (VP) of Lifetime Adoption, Heather Featherston holds an MBA and is passionate about working with those facing adoption, pregnancy, and parenting issues. Heather has conducted training for birth parent advocates, spoken to professional groups, and has appeared on television and radio to discuss the multiple aspects of adoption. She has provided one-on-one support to women and hopeful adoptive parents working through adoption decisions.

Since 2002, she has been helping pregnant women and others in crisis to learn more about adoption. Heather also trains and speaks nationwide to pregnancy clinics to effectively meet the needs of women who want to explore adoption for their child. Today, she continues to address the concerns women have about adoption and supports the needs of women who choose adoption for their child.

As a published author of the book Called to Adoption, Featherston loves to see God’s hand at work every day as she helps children and families come together through adoption.

Read more about Heather Featherston