The journey to adopt a baby is full of detours, unforgettable experiences, challenges, and magnificent examples of God’s grace all along the way.
Without the right preparation and education, this journey can become more than challenging. But with awareness and planning, your adoption journey will be one that promotes growth and blessings for everyone involved.
Here are 4 things you’ll need for a successful Christian adoption journey:
1. A Lifetime Commitment
The adoption journey must begin with a commitment for life. Similar to the vows you took when you got married, adoption demands commitment in sickness and in health, and for richer or for poorer.
Hopeful adoptive parents need to start their journey faithfully and fearlessly. As the apostle James advises, “Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.” (James 1:12). When couples stay the course and complete the adoption journey, they are able to experience the blessings that God has promised.
The path to adoption is a walk by faith and should be approached with the same fearless spirit that God asks of every aspect of your Christian walk. Faith is necessary. As Moses said, “Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the Lord will bring you today. The Egyptians you see today you will never see again. The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.” (Exodus 14:13-14).
You might also experience difficult times when you wonder why God has called upon you to adopt. From the very start, hopeful adoptive parents must recognize their fears, stand firm, and trust God.
3. Confronting Your Fears
What does it take to have fearless love? You started your adoption journey with a heart of love for the child who will come into your home. You prepared your family, your home, and your finances, but might have forgotten to look at your own heart first. Yet this inner journey is an important part of the adoption process that shouldn’t be overlooked.
As the adoptive parent, real love allows you to examine your own fears. It’s only when you confront these fears that a fearless love can be grown. It takes strength to ask difficult questions about the fears that live within your spirit. “There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.” (1 John 4:18).
Place your fears at the feet of Jesus. He loves us with His perfect love, and out of that overflow, we’re able to love our children unconditionally.
Your faith gives you a foundation of commitment and love, along with the selflessness that parenting requires. We know from the Bible that “Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress” (James 1:27). For many, looking after orphans through adoption is a direct expression of their obedience and faith to God.
Without having a foundation of faith before you begin your adoption journey, you might land on a detour as you try to achieve the world’s wisdom. But with a faith-filled heart, you can find the wisdom that God wants to provide for you as the parent to a child He has chosen for you.
You may encounter unplanned obstacles during your journey, but faith and unconditional love will pave the way. You need faith in our loving Father so that you can love your adopted child. Faith enables you to see your child’s needs from God’s perspective and successfully stay in the journey for the long haul despite stressors and distractions.
Discover how you can answer God’s call to adopt, and begin your Christian adoption journey! Complete Lifetime’s free online application today.
Founder of Lifetime Adoption, adoptive mom, adoption expert, and Certified Open Adoption Practitioner (C.O.A.P).
Since 1986, adoption expert Mardie Caldwell has been dedicated to bringing couples and birth parents together in order to fulfill their dreams.
“Many years ago, I was also searching for a child to adopt. We didn’t know where or how to get started. Through research, determination, and a prayer, our dream of a family became reality. I started with a plan, a notebook, assistance from a caring adoption consultant and a lot of hard work; this was my family I was building. We had a few heartaches along the way, but the pain of not having children was worse!
Within weeks we had three different birth mothers choose us. We were overwhelmed and delighted. Many unsettling events would take place before our adoption would be finalized, many months later. Little did I know that God was training and aligning me for the adoption work I now do today. It is my goal to share with our families the methods and plans which succeed and do not succeed. I believe adoption should be affordable and can be a wonderful “pregnancy” for the adoptive couple.
I have also been on both sides of infertility with the loss of seven pregnancies and then conceiving by new technology, giving birth to a healthy daughter. I have experienced first-hand the emotional pain of infertility and believe my experience allows me to serve your needs better.
It is my hope that for you, the prospective parents, your desire for a child will be fulfilled soon.”