The waiting and uncertainty of adoption can be a real test of faith for hopeful Christian adoptive parents. For Christians, adoption is a virtuous path that heeds God’s call to care for the orphans. As James 1:27 says, “Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress.”
Delays and disruptions along your adoption journey can make it feel like your prayers to answer God’s call are not heard. What is the point of praying when you don’t seem to be getting any answers?
Prayer is about much more than fulfilling requests. Persistent prayer not only strengthens your relationship with God, but it is also God’s way of helping you develop the clarity and strength you will need to move through your Christian adoption journey with grace.
Prayer Keeps You Moving Forward
There can be long pauses and silence during the adoption process that may feel like unanswered prayers. These are the times when fear and doubt can creep into your mind.
Why didn’t the birth mother choose us? Is there something wrong with us? Maybe we’re not meant to be parents.
These dark thoughts can be paralyzing, leaving you stuck because you are too afraid to make a wrong move. Prayer liberates you from that fear because you are putting what you can’t control into God’s hands. You are free to move forward with your life and take charge of the things you can control. God will handle your prayers so you can keep moving, loving, and growing along your path of Christian adoption.
Prayer Sheds Light on Your True Desires
Keep praying to reinforce what it is you truly want. Sometimes our requests can be too narrow, and tunnel vision causes us to miss out on the opportunities God places before us.
For example, praying for a call from a birth mother might be too small of a request. Search your heart for what you really desire. To grow your family? To share your love with a child? To create a legacy?
God may be answering those requests in ways other than a call from a birth mother. He might be opening paths in your life that you never thought to explore, or placing people in your life you never thought to connect with. Persistent prayer will shed light on those paths to God’s answers.
Prayer Strengthens Your Faith in God’s Plan
Trust in God to lead you through your Christian adoption journey, especially through periods of doubt and disappointment. We are short-sighted. We only see the gifts and obstacles that are right in front of us. God sees the entire plan and how our lives intersect with those around us. He knows when to bless us with the answers to our prayers, and when that blessing will have the most significant impact on our lives.
There may be reasons for your adoption wait that you can not yet see. God may have different plans for the birth mother you’ve been praying would call you back. He may be opening opportunities in her life so that she can parent her child. The child who was meant for you might not be born yet. Hold on to your faith in God’s plan for you. His timing is based not only on your personal journey but also on how your journey will bless others.
Prayer Helps You Grow
We can only grow when we are challenged. Delays and disappointment along your Christian adoption journey will challenge you. God’s silence will test your faith, but it will also build your strength and endurance.
You can keep going as you wait for your adoption prayers to be answered. You may learn that you are stronger than you thought, and God knows you will need this strength for future challenges. You’ll need to be strong for your child. You’ll need endurance because parenting and raising a child in the Christian faith is a lifelong commitment.
A Guide for Prayerful Reflection on Your Christian Adoption Journey
Name a specific prayer request for your Christian adoption journey. Peel back a layer of that prayer request by asking what you really want. Focus your prayers on this broader desire, and open your heart to new opportunities that may come with this shift.
List five qualities you value in a Christian parent. How might this delay help you develop these qualities?
Think of another time in your life when a prayer felt unanswered or denied. Can you think of how that denial actually opened up a different opportunity for you? Imagine and write down three scenarios that show how this delay could lead to greater satisfaction further along in your Christian adoption journey.
